Strange fruit.
Woes to those that are born. Weeping as they're pulled from the womb. For what but a paradise lost? The spite for the vessel that bore the fruit. Already longing to go home.
Poor.
I am poor. Economically, emotionally, spiritually. Poor. Can't grow nothing but this tangled thorns. Omg, I can't believe that I exist on borrowed time, no less. Excuse me if I make a mess, I've always tried my best. But I can't tolerate myself, the reason I can't stand still: don't want to meet nobody that speaks like me moves like me thinks like me. Forgive me. I am poor.
Fuck you.
They taught me to always run & hide, just keeping the eyes on how to survive. Not to inspire to anything more than a wife. I remember the first time I had to lie to say a novel I was reading wasn't mine to save it from being teared apart because it's not on the final test. I thought I wasn't strong enough to completely tell them to fuck themselves. So instead I built this beautiful wall, and invested in multi-layered control. Yeh, ma & pa, thank you for preparing me for the "real" world.
Fill.
Wormy Apple.

Ways away.
Just when you are getting comfortable, you find out there's ways, ways & ways to go. Maybe it's the ego that's insatiable, always, always, always looking for something new. Maybe it's the curse of never having a home, or maybe I'm still a kid in the candy store. But please, please, please show me what is this all for.
To the Actor.
What makes you want to be another person? Assume the precise loco motions? Generate the sparks by selling the cells? In the end not to have a life at all? The actor thinks it's all a joke. The laughters & tears can last in films. But we are not the same, I'm in a different place. Maybe another time, I will remember the name. To act in order to be, makes yourself nice & cheap. All the puppets have strings, one day they will end up a messy heap. But what other ways to live?
To My Bitch Boss.
You trying to kill me? Bossing me like I'm your secretary? Your bottom bitch? Coming down a ton of bricks? No warning nor a friendly reprieve? It's all up to me, huh? Well, I'm telling you to wait. The good times are looking vague. You know what I'm saying? Yeh, you better walk away. You think you are grade A? Well, I have seen you shiver at the first sigh of hard labor. "Tough" ain't in your vocabulary, so step out of my way. And shield your eyes, your fairy land's built on the slaughter lane. Hey, don't hate the player, you ain't even in the game. High morals & low dresses, you dizzy yet? Of course not. Who you're looking at but your brand new bitch boss?
I want to die..
I want to die wondering what tomorrow brings, observing the crystalized moments form a complete palette, and finally, the perfect freedom to create a life that's more real than it's ever been.



